Ever felt like you’re going backwards? In the sense that you feel as if you are not moving forward. There’s no progression – no transcendental enlightenment – it just the same quotidian routine, except however, it has taken a turn for the worse – the backward worse. What do I mean by backward? Let me tell you:
Imagine that you had all these dreams and goals that were pulled right down under from you? Imagine someone becoming really ill all of a sudden and expenses are high over your head because you’re so poor you can’t afford insurance? Imagine that you’re being evicted and you have thirty days and you can’t find a place because you have a dog and another useless dependent. Imagine you being so ready for the future and your future husband/wife dies? Every where you turn for a job, the opportunity closes. Imagine you being so ready for the future…
That’s the thing, the future is full of uncertainties.
You have money saved up for school, a house, a wedding etc. and then boom a crisis happens and those dreams and goals evaporate. Or do they?
Someone out there always has it worse than you. You gotta bite down on your tongue, wipe those tears and move on.
It’s stupid to be complacent, which is what I feel now… So to moving forward, doing what I can and hope for the best.
Someone once told me that having expectations meant making room for disappointments. Thus that explains why it sure feels like hell when my ten year plan looks a bit shabby 
.
July 25, 2008
